And here I am, fighting with my feelings again. I thought I knew better than to fall for someone(or someones) again, but I guess one can't defy one's heart.
But, inevitably I will come over the only conclusion of the trial of a new relationship to be redundant, as as far as my experience shows, it'll end badly, no matter what I do. So, if the failure is a certainty, why bother? One could argue the educational values of the experience in between the try and fail, but I personally have found that time between those two deplorably short, so the learning curve would be small if not nonexistent.
Also one could argue the odds of the failure, but if a love relation ends, something went wrong. My one and only love relationship taught me alot, but then again if m speculations are correct, substance of this said wasn't love, but support. And as the support(me) became superfluous, the additional variable was removed from the calculation.
So, if I've elarned something, it is that most things, that are generally classified as feeling-controlled, are actually just sub-conscious deeds of survival&health masqueradinga as feelings. With this in mind, I should ask myself, do I even want a relationshipin the first hand. Though I do miss the feeling of an oxitosine kick when one kisses, hugs or does anything with the one who he/she loves.
But I think I can do fine without.
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