I feel like all my fandoms are being stolen from me.

That's right.

I've been thinking for a long time what to write about, and finally I have a viable subject.

 There's this one certain guy(and a couple others, too) that like same games and movies that I do. These guys could be good friends to me, except if the weren't COMPLETE ASSHOLES.
Rrr.
 The one certain guy I spoke of, for example, is the most egocentric, narcistic asshole I've ever met. Really.
I used to be in OK relationships with him-don't know how- until once a common friend of ours suffered a traumatic experience, and he laughed about it, with passion. And promoted how cool guy he was because it didn't happen to him, immediately after it. Now if that doesn't scream mental disorder, what does?

This guy gives me a headache every, single, fucking, time I see him. And unfortunately that is pretty often.

And how much would I give to kill him, preferably semi-fast. Don't want to get myself dirty, and want to get rid of him as soon as possible.

 Now that I have claimed to hate him, I'll get on with it.

I share fandoms with him. For example, Metal Gear Solid and Elder Scrolls. Now that Skyrim is out, I hear him tlaking about it constantly. And whenever I see someone play Skyrim or talk about Skyrim, My mind makes a connection to him. The same with MGS. For very obvious reasons this is pissing me off.

 I know some(most) of those who'll read this will consider this(and thus, me) nitpicky and vainglorious, I don't give a shit. For me particularly this is a very big and annopying deal.

It's good to be working again.

As the title says. It's been too long since I'd made props. It's good to be back in the workshop.
On the downside, the workshop time eats my sleep time, but who needs sleep anyways. I can sleep days in if necessary. I prefer night-time anyway.


Nothing drastic has happened. Life is still mainly boring. Though Discovery channel is quite treacherous to me. It _Forces_ me to watch it late into the night, because all the interesting programs air at night! Bloody hell! Not that I complain! I jsut get stuck on front of the telly instead of eating, going to bed or other creative activity.

I signed myself to a game developing course on my school. Came out of the blue. Will see soon what comes out of that.

Winter is coming

Slowly yet steadily. Life is becoming avid of content, more and more I find myself doing nothing but thinking.
In essence, it is a bad thing too. I have maybe too much time to settle my thoughts, which reveals....questionable facts.

Surprisingly I find myself with this feeling again.

24h Comic Book Day

..Which I am attending today from 1800 forth. So far no idea what will I ddrawwrite about, but it's getting to it...
..Somewhat.

Not so urget happenings:
My comp is currently on the fritz, so I'll be less online and updating my stuff than usual. Dunno how long this state will last, unfortunately.
I haven't been doing really anything lately, so in any case, I wouldn't have anything to write about either.
No big loss I guess?

77...

...of hours being awake. Well, minus the occasional minute or two that i dozed before a security guard stabbed me back to conscience.

That said, Tracon VI is gone by. And have to say, propably the best con this season. I has lots and lots of fun and met old friends and made almsot ridiculous amount of new ones. The few lectures I attended were intereting, although the tire got the best of me once in a while, and missed portions.
 As usual I didn't go to see the cosplay competition, since the photos will be in the internets anyways. I took surprisingly small amount of photos (only 109; gasp!), as I usually take around 300-500pics/con.
 LARPING IS FUN! Something I had forgotten, unfortunately. But yeah, the larp was fun, met lots of nice people there =D

People I'd like to thank for this weekend:
-Jani: Thanks again for being a great, great friend! Hanging around  with you makes anything fun =)
-Aaro: As above, so below! Thanks for organizing people to take care of my&other con-goers' stuff =) Don't play too much Witcher, although a good game it is, leave time for your gf too, she's a great person.
-Juha&Linda: For company on train trips, for being good friends and for convincing me to buy the Firefly DVD box!
-Janne: For ABSURDLY AWESOME lectures and tolerating my stupidity =)
-Chris: First time in a long while I argued properely with someone, thank you truly for that. Also thanks for triggering self-searching in me, I needed that.
-All the people whose names I can't remember, people who let me take a picture of them, whom I chatted with, and the people organizing the larp.

Greatest thanks goes to Pinja for listening to me and cheering me up when I was tired and down, you saved my weekend=)

About friends who clearly are not OK.

I have this habit of taking care of my friends. It has evolved over a stretch of time, and I seem to be gifted with it, as everyone who have allowed me to help have left with a weight lifted off them. Or whatever they feel.

 Yeah, some people that I have encountered have also considered the offer of help an insult. I don't know why, maybe they are just too damn proud or consider their matters their own or too grave for me to tend to (as a notifier: I'm no stranger to dragging people off bridges the long way, nor confiscating someone's sharp things). Or those people might not like me at all, hell if I know.
 I admit: it has became a habit. When someone I care of is troubled in any way, I find my self neck and neck responsible for it(some times I am), and feel a duty of helping to sort it through. I have encountered more than my share of suicides and suicidal people, and I know that no matter how strong person you are, nor how silly the matter is, the threshold is VERY shallow. I take precautions on even the smallest things.

 Helping people with problems is like defusing a bomb: even if it isn't a real threat or armed, it still has to be treated as one. I know that most people are pretty hair-triggered about other people meddling with their matters, and know that in the other end of the scale is the possibility of eternal(or otherwise pretty darn long) hatred towards me.
 Also a thing in common with bombs is the fact that things most likely are complicated: settling one matter might make things worse, too. Things tend to be chained, and one wrong word can lead into hours, days, or even months long shitstorms.

I hope you people can understand with feelings other than cynicizm and sarcasm that when I offer help, I really, REALLY just want to help, and sincerely do care for you. It really hurts me when someone jsut rudely shoves my offer aside, or even worse gets angry because of it. I know some of you feel like I'm pushing it, and I might be, but please even try to understand.

 I have been repeatedly informed that I don't have a heart, but even if I don't seem like it or show it, yes, I am a relatively human being, and I have feelings too. When I meantion it, my concern is real, and some of you people that have to endure me are truly dear to me. I wish you can understand it, or even try to do so.

Some people on this planet are meant to die.

Some people still find it surprising how "cruel" and "heartless" I can be.
Of how I can shrug accidents and deaths with a simple "Oh well" or "Had it coming".

It is because humanity needs examples.

There are celebrities. Celebrities who people adore and whose lives people want to live. And replicate.
Awful lot of these celebrities have alcohol and/or drug/etc. problems. These also being things that people want try. Because nothing your beloved celeb does can be wrong, right?

Every time when a celeb dies of alcohol poisoning or overdoses, something inside me screams "Yes!".
That is because people need to see where lives like their can lead into, and what is the likely end for them.
THIS is why I act as I do.